Piss-meme

Randonauts typically report high-levels of urine-filled bottles laying around close to attractors.

"It weren’t exactly a piss bottle, as it was a bottle that had been placed in my bag in the reality I shifted, but maybe it was piss flavoured teriyaki sauce? Who knows"

This is highly anomalous behaviour. (Reality itself behaving wierdly). Our top team of expert meme-researchers (paid with 1000 doges/second) are still figuring out what this means.

Health?



There's a chance that the gold of the ancients could have actually been human urine.

It's loaded with vitamins and enzymes and it's known that the Romans used to used it to wash their clothes, as gun powder, medicine and to brush their teeth as is evidenced in this somewhat comical passage by the roman poet Catullus:

"Egnatius, because he has snow-white teeth, smiles all the time. If you’re a defendant in court, when the counsel draws tears, he smiles: if you’re in grief at the pyre of pious sons, the lone lorn mother weeping, he smiles. Whatever it is, wherever it is, whatever he’s doing, he smiles: he’s got a disease, neither polite, I would say, nor charming. So a reminder to you, from me, good Egnatius. If you were a Sabine or Tiburtine or a fat Umbrian, or plump Etruscan, or dark toothy Lanuvian, or from north of the Po, and I’ll mention my own Veronese too, or whoever else clean their teeth religiously, I’d still not want you to smile all the time: there’s nothing more foolish than foolishly smiling. Now you’re Spanish: in the country of Spain what each man pisses, he’s used to brushing his teeth and red gums with, every morning, so the fact that your teeth are so polished just shows you’re the more full of piss."

quantum_piss
It's ingrained in our collective consciousness as westerners to look upon urine as a waste product and the idea of drinking urine seems abhorent. But urine isn't waste, it is surplus. It is the result of blood being filtered through the kidneys and is completeley sterile upon exit from the body. Bottled water is likely to posses more contaminants than urine. I regularly use it to get over sicknesses, wash my hair, and wash my face giving rise to a nice complexion and soft skin, but I'm hesitant to tell others with good reason. In today's world it's commonly used in India Ayurvedic medicine and traditional Chinese medicinal practices.

Buddhist monks were given clearance and even encouragement to utilise it; it could even be argued that Jesus prompted his followers to make use of their urine:

"Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well. " -- Proverbs 5;15

Why would we be taught to express disgust with urine? Simple. If we had access to the most powerful substance giving us great health, good complexion and numerous other benefits, how would pharmacutical companies make money? Urea (the component in urine which gives it it's power) is an ingredient found in in shampoos and mainstream medicines, so you've probably used it without even knowing it.

In extreme circumstances, people have sustatined themselves on nothing but their own urine and have been found trapped in a cave in perfect health.

This is certainly the golden elixir. (and also whenever you piss it creates many thousands of terabytes of quantum entropy data)